


Grey Area

by twistedheroine



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Idk what i'm doing, Reylo - Freeform, The Force Ships It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-06-26 17:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15668220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twistedheroine/pseuds/twistedheroine
Summary: Picks up immediately after TLJ - Canon (to the best of my knowledge)Decimated and barely holding on after Crait, the Resistance needs to rebuild before they can plan their next move while the First Order relentlessly hunts them down. Rey is sure of her commitment to General Organa and her friends in the Resistance but struggles to come to terms with losing Ben Solo to the Dark Side. Kylo Ren can barely contain his emotions as he follows tips across the galaxy, looking to catch the rebels and finish them once and for all. He's pissed - and he can't stop thinking about her.





	1. Chapter 1

Anger, seething and red, coursed through his veins, and it was growing more powerful by the second. Not because the last scraps of the rebellion escaped Crait, at least not anymore, although that is what first set the hot shoots of rage through his body, but thanks to that little feeling that kept sneaking up on him. Regret, irritating as a persistent bluebottle trapped between window panes, would whisper to Kylo Ren. It enraged him.

He cursed at the mistakes running through his mind. He let himself be tricked by some kind of projection of Skywalker, an extraordinary feat of jedi power to be sure, but Kylo knew that if he had only kept his ego in check and stayed focused on taking out the rebels instead of his former teacher the war would now be over. And the girl. Rey. He cursed himself for not killing her when he had the chance, he cursed her for coming into his life.

He cursed her because he couldn’t shake the whispers of regret that were growing louder by the day inside of him. His thoughts kept returning to the way she looked at him through their inexplicable connection, standing on the loading ramp of the Millennium Falcon. The way she shut him out.

He let out a roar of rage and frustration even as he stormed down the hallway of the Finalizer towards the main communications hub on D Level. A pair of technicians scuttled out of sight as he passed. The crew had always been anxious in his presence but wisely avoided him like the plague in the three days since the utter failure on Crait. 

A woosh of vapour from the airlock release curled around his legs as he strode through the door of the comms hub and spotted General Hux, looking sour as ever.

“Supreme Leader,” Hux inclined his head respectfully, but his pinched face gave away his distaste. “Our hackers have intercepted a number of distress calls from the rebel scum - desperate pleas to join their lost cause.”

“And?” Kylo Ren spat. “Where are they?”

“The calls originate from six different star systems. We believe they are transmitting remotely and scrambling the data, it is unlikely that they are hiding out in any of those systems since they are all strongholds of the First Order.” Hux pointed out each cluster of planets on a hologram as he spoke. “The calls don’t seem to use any cipher or code - it’s simple propaganda, ‘free yourselves and join the resistance’ type messaging. They aren’t even trying to amass a force in their location. Their goal seems to be to encourage pockets of discontent across the galaxy, establishing small bands of rebels on their home planets to cause trouble there. Small fires, easily put out.”

Kylo clenched and unclenched his fists. “You’re telling me we still don’t know where they are.” 

The room was silent apart from the automatic beeps and buzzing of the machinery, while none of the comms personnel so much as dared press a button. Hux cleared his throat and shifted his weight. “We know where to expect ripples of unrest. I advise-”

“Send ground troops with air support to affected planets,” Kylo barked and began to leave. “The rebels may send scouts to those locations to recruit.” He stopped when he reached the door, the airlock letting out another rush of air. He kept his voice steady, mastering the rage that threatened to split him in two. “Half rations for the entire crew until we capture one of them. Half rations for all comms units until you idiots do your job and FIND THEM!” 

***

By the fourth day on the Millennium Falcon they had no choice but to land and replenish supplies. The ship had seemed reasonably well stocked when it was just Rey and Chewie on board, but with the addition of the forty-odd rebels whisked away from Crait - so few! It hurt Rey’s chest to think of it - food and oxygen were running out fast. Fuel was another issue. They were burning through it like there was no tomorrow with the amount of hyperspeed jumps they pulled to throw off the First Order. They ping ponged across the galaxy as they transmitted distress signals in every system urging the oppressed and downtrodden rise up and join the cause. But now as they lowered into the atmosphere of Savareen, Rey frowned and wondered if it would be best to tighten their belts instead and hold out for a response to their distress call after all.

Chewie made a low whining noise, something she had never heard him do before. “What’s wrong Chewie?” she asked, not quite catching his meaning. “You’ve been here before!” she cried after he repeated himself a little louder, but he still sounded on edge. A job with Han, he explained. It must not have gone well, she guessed judging by his tense demeanor.

Before she could wheedle the full story out of him, the door to the cockpit opened and General Organa joined them. Leia gave her a tight-lipped smile then looked to the landscape below.

“Beautiful, from this distance,” Leia nodded at the rising mountain peaks and the plains that were visible beyond. “But you need to be aware that this place will not be a safe haven for us, it’s merely a necessary stop on the long road ahead. You will need to trust in your intuition and be on your guard.”

Rey looked at the General who seemed to have aged years in a matter of days and noted the way she seemed to be steeling herself for something unpleasant. “I don’t like this place,” Rey admitted. “It feels...sick. I don’t know why I think that, but it doesn’t feel right. Why are we here? Not fuel or supplies, we could have stopped anywhere. What are we really doing here?”

Chewie quietly began the landing sequence from where he sat in the pilot’s chair - he knew every quirk of this ship and it was only right that he helm it from now on. They were soaring over the ridge of mountains, pulling into the flat lands on the edge of a small city comprising of ancient looking towers in the centre of sprawling shanties and squat huts.

General Organa smoothed her robe and took a deep breath. “We’re here to scrounge up money.”

“I see.”

“You will see. I want you to be my escort when I meet with our potential financiers.”

Rey wondered if the general expected a generous donation or if they would find themselves eventually caught in a dangerous entanglement with loan sharks. Given the psychic stink of this place, she was inclined to assume the latter. General Organa’s uncanny ability to guess her thoughts kicked in and the older woman attempted a reassuring smile and squeezed her shoulder. “We’ll head out as soon as we land. With luck, we’ll be back before dark and can get out of here before too many eyes take note of our presence.”

An hour later, Poe took a handful of others to hunt down everything from oxygen tanks and ration packets to soap and blasters while General Organa and Rey went deeper into the metropolis. Dressed plainly in brown homespun, they pulled their hoods down low and the general went as far as to stoop and shuffle, which exacerbated how old and tired she had looked all day. Grimy merchants shouted from their shabby stalls, trying to sell them rotting fish heads and cracked beads. A putrid yellow fog wafted through the air and burned their throats. There must be a refinery nearby, and Rey guessed that was where the money was in this otherwise ragged and forlorn city. 

At length they reached their destination at the end of a narrow alley filled with cloudy yellow puddles. A burly, scaled humanoid stood in front of a thick titanium door. General Organa looked up at him from under her hood, her eyes glinting in the small amount of fading light that reached between the tall stone towers - they were in the heart of the city by now. He didn’t appear to recognize her until she muttered “She’ll want to hear what I have to say” and flashed her ring with the symbol of the Resistance on it. He opened the door and they stepped inside a gallery that could only be described as opulent.

Ceilings twenty feet high rose above them, meeting in a peak of arched stone detailing, while extravagantly dressed people and beings from across the galaxy mingled among the many dining or gaming tables, scooping up cocktails or delicacies from silver trays borne by servers in identical sleek black uniforms. A band played in the far corner, and the unfamiliar squeal of their brass instruments added to the din of voices and clinking glassware. 

They headed deeper into the crowd and Rey realized the General was leading them to another heavy titanium door at the back with two guards this time. A server bearing a tray of seafood hor d'oeuvres passed by and Rey instinctually snatched up as many of the seared blue tentacles as she could fit in her hands, the server’s initially started expression quickly melted into disapproval when he noticed she’d cleared him out. She attacked the food, cramming it into her mouth before thinking to offer any to the General, and the greedy way she stuffed her face coupled with their rough clothing drew more than a few sneering looks from the glittering people around them but she couldn’t help it. After a lifetime surviving on meal powders on Jakku followed by ration packets on board ships, the smell of warm, solid food was too much to resist and she moaned in pleasure as she chewed.

The corners of General Organa mouth twitched but she didn’t comment on the gaffe, politely shaking her head when Rey finally offered the last couple bites. “Seriously, you should try it - this is the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted!” Rey urged but popped them into her mouth anyway.

“The person we’re about to meet is called Qiru,” the General said before they were in earshot of the guards.”She may not look imposing, but don’t be fooled. She leads a crime syndicate that has had a chokehold on this planet for generations. They are the worst kind of criminals to be sure, they are slavers, thieves, and murderers but we are as desperate as we’ve ever been and they are the wealthiest organization this side of the galaxy that doesn’t play by the rules. Let me do the talking - I know how these people operate.”

“It’s not too late to back out now,” Rey whispered. She noticed that the servers had been branded on the inside of their wrists and tingles of unease ran down her spine.

“Trust me,” General Organa replied.

They reached the door and were confronted by the guards. Rey felt naked without the reassuring weight of Luke’s lightsaber at her hip. She’d tried to fix it several times now, but the kyber crystal that powered the laser had a chip and she hadn’t been able to get it to work yet. Luckily, the guards waved them through when it was clear they had no weapons. What harm could an old woman and a young girl bring to the most feared criminals in the galaxy?

“A royal visit, how delightful. Excuse me if I don’t get the curtsy right,” came a cynical drawl from a petite woman with brown curls and pretty brown eyes.

This smaller room was a dark, quiet haven in comparison to the scene of excess they’d just witnessed. The woman, flanked by more muscle with a goon standing alert at each shoulder, didn’t bother rising to meet them.

“As a general, I prefer salutes to curtsies these days,” General Organa took the seat across the woman called Qiru while Rey opted to mirror the scene across the table and stand. “You look well.”

“You’ve looked better.”

Rey kept her face stoic but started inwardly at that. How many times has the leader of the Resistance met with known criminals?

“I’m sure you’ve heard by now that we’ve suffered some losses,” General Organa wasted no more time on small talk. 

“Some losses? I understand your entire fleet was wiped out along with most if not all of your ground forces,” Qiru raised an eyebrow and poured them both stiff drinks from a crystal decanter. “A shame. Crimson Dawn was rooting for you.”

“Yes I’m sure you were quite torn up by the news, the Resistance has been convenient for your organization. Not many things distract the First Order so well as a war.”

“Mmmhmm,” Qiru sipped her drink. “Nobody likes having Big Brother looking into their business all the time. But I suppose we had better get used to taxes! Those Dark Side types really hate when you keep things from them.” Qiru stared the general down and there was a coldness in her eyes.

“Yes I suppose you must. Until we secure more ships we won’t be able to raise any hell for you. We need X-Wings and A-Wings to start, at least twenty.”

“That’s it? My word Princess, you must really be out of the game if you came all the way here just to ask for a handful of fighter jets!” Qiru’s laughter didn’t reach her eyes, which had at last flicked over to Rey and took her in curiously.

“Can you do it?” 

“Of course I can. You should be asking if I will. What’s this one do?” she nodded at Rey.

“Nothing. She does my hair, every princess has handmaids,” General Organa’s voice dripped with sarcasm on the word princess. Qiru laughed again but continued to regard Rey with interest. 

The younger woman downed the rest of her drink and leaned forward, all humour gone. “Well, now that you are here I can see that you’re amenable to doing Crimson Dawn a favour...or two, or three. I want you to steal a shipment of coaxium to and get it to Corellia undetected. By this time tomorrow the docks will be crawling with First Order bastards to count every last tube and take their cut for the glory of the empire. It’s too obvious if we do it ourselves, but if you make a show in that infamous freighter you flew in on then Crimson Dawn can appear to be righteously angry along with our miserable overlords.”

“If you expect us to agree to that, then I want enough money for 20 fighters plus a starship.” General Organa said.

“Enough for 20 when you reach Corellia, and enough for ten more if you draw the First Order surveillance off Coruscant four cycles from now. A starship is gonna cost you a lot more jobs.” The general was quiet for several moments before she shot her hand out with resolve and shook on the deal. Qiru smiled and looked all innocence as her eyes fell on Rey once more. “What’s your name?” 

“Rey-”

“Sarah-” 

They’d spoken at once, the general casting out the first thing that came to mind and Rey letting her actual name slip out before cursing herself as General Organa abruptly stood and they hurried to leave, Qiru smiling up at her with malice in her big brown eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Even the air had a salty tang to it in the oceanside town of Rogeeti on Makeb, carried by the breeze off the harbour that lifted Kylo’s jet black hair and whipped his cape about his ankles as he walked. He spat more than once in an attempt to get the briney taste out of his mouth - it was reminding him of the salt planet Crait and exacerbating his already short fuse. Restless and feeling like a caged animal on board the Finalizer, he thought joining the ground forces to weed out Resistance recruiters on the nearest target planet would be a welcome distraction but this was proving to be a bad start. 

Stormtroopers were fanning out to question locals and perform random searches of the many docked ships of the busy port. The most disaffected residents of this resource rich planet were deeper in the interior and were the people who did the backbreaking work in the quarries. They were worked like dogs and many died in accidents on the worksites or simply dropped dead from the hard living. It was little surprise to Kylo when he learned a large number of stormtroopers were from Makeb, their parents sometimes selling them out of desperation or freely handing them over in the hopes that even army life would be better for their children than to stay here. A separate unit had been deployed to investigate at the largest quarry while this port was where the harvested resources were shipped out, so it was also likely that the Resistance would try to smuggle recruits off the planet on one of these freighters.

Two stormtroopers hailed him from the doorway of a shop and he veered across the road to join them, stopping the bustling flow of traffic with a wave of the Force. He felt shock and fear ripple through the rows of frozen speeders and he was gratified by the swell of power he felt flow through him so easily.

“Sir, we have something,” the higher ranking trooper said and led him into the rickety tackle shop that was little more than a shack. A man wringing his hands and sweating profusely stood at the counter, eyes flicking from the troopers to Kylo Ren and widening as he took in the lightsaber at his belt.

“You have information for the First Order?” Kylo towered over the man.

“I - I think so,” the man took a handkerchief from his pocket and dabbed at the beads of sweat that covered his forehead. “Two people - a Dressellian and a human - stopped in the tavern next door two days ago asking lots of questions about quarries.”

“What questions?” Kylo interjected.

“Asking where the biggest ones were, which ones had the worst working conditions.  
They were curious about the First Order’s presence as overseers. Wanted to know how many there could be on site.”

The First Order replaced all the overseers when they first occupied the planet with ruthless loyalists who all carried electric-current whips. Production was better than ever. “What did they look like - the human?” All Dressellians looked the same to Kylo.

“The human was male and had light hair. I’m s-sorry I don’t know anything else,” the man’s hand shook as he wiped his forehead again. Kylo probed his mind and easily extracted their image from him, ignoring his squawk of terrified surprise at the intrusion. With a nod he gave the stormtroopers the go ahead to put the call out over the unit dispatches and directed them to pay the man for the intel. The First Order was hated on this planet, but with the right amount of palm greasing they could keep their interests here firmly under control once this bubbling rebellion was taken care of.

The salty taste returned when he was back in the street, once again taking his mind to where he knelt in the old rebel base holding his father’s gold dice and feeling like his heart was on fire the pain and guilt had been so bad, he didn’t think he could feel any worse but then he had locked eyes with Rey and the sense of loss consumed him. 

He forced himself to turn his emotions to rage, anything was better than this pain he was feeling now. With a quick pivot he abruptly turned around, heading back in the direction of the tavern and unhooked his lightsaber. The blade came to life, crackling and snapping with unstable energy that reflected the roiling emotions of its owner. The tavern staff had failed to share that they had patrons acting suspiciously recently, and for that omission they were about to learn the extent of the Supreme Leader’s displeasure.

***

“Incoming!” 

Rey hollered from her position in the gunner seat as she swung around to aim at the group of TIE fighters that were now zooming their way.

“We got this!” Poe shouted. Rey felt better knowing the best pilot in the Resistance was in the cockpit with Chewie, who was roaring his head off each time a blast dinged the ship’s shields.

“Secure the coaxium - strap it down with whatever we have!” General Organa was running through the hold towards the pallets holding the highly explosive contraband. “Poe don’t pull any stunts! If this stuff so much as cracks it’s all over for us.” Finn and the rest of the crew were hurriedly tying the pallets in place, running to grab more ropes and holding them steady each time a particularly sharp turn jostled the crates. 

The TIE fighters swerved in and out of view and Rey swivelled the gun, locking in the scope and picking them off one by one. She tried not to think about the fact that these were just people in those First Order jets, people like Finn who may just be victims of circumstance. It would be easier to shoot them out of the sky if they were clones, but as it was each time she landed a direct hit her adrenaline soared and she felt sick all at once.

There were only two left by the time all the coaxium was safely secured enough to jump to lightspeed, throwing her backward in the gunner seat reeling with both elation and battle sickness, unsure which was worse. The thrill of joy she felt, knowing she had just sent the TIE fighter pilots to their death, caressed the edges of her awareness, pulled her. The thought of Kylo Ren feeling the same sick elation nudged itself, unwelcome, into her consciousness. She stuffed the Darkness down, swallowing hard and squeezing her eyes shut as she focused all her energy to realign with the Light. 

She was still frozen in place in the gunner seat brow furrowed and jaw set when Finn burst in whooping and thumped her on the back. “That was amazing, Rey! You took out those TIE fighters like they were nothing, and that last barrel roll before we jumped to lightspeed, did you know you were gonna take two out with the one shot or was that just a lucky accident?! I thought the coaxium was gonna blow for sure-” Rey smiled at her friend while disentangling herself from the gunner chair, laughing at his over the top reenactments. It was a welcome distraction from her earlier line of thought and being in his presence she felt safely immersed in the Light Side of the Force once again.

They headed to the main deck together, sidestepping crates of supplies along the way. Poe had a very successful haul on Savareen, though the supplies were now crammed into every corner and passageway of the Falcon making it even more crowded than they could have imagined. Rey didn’t mind - she relished having so much company and smiled to herself at the sight of a couple makeshift beds that had been set up on top of the crates lining the hall. She happily traded in her privacy for the reassuring chatter of busy resistance fighters that now filled the ship.

Everyone was gathered around General Organa when they reached the main deck. The general stood when she saw Rey enter and a hush settled over the room as she addressed them all.

“I want to start by thanking everyone who helped us on a successful supply run,” General Organa smiled and looked into the many attentive faces turned toward her. “We now have enough fuel to drop off the rest of the recruiting teams in their assigned systems and can begin to rebuild. We’ll drop off one more team on the way before unloading the coaxium on Corellia, where we will also leave behind another pair of recruiters. From there, we deploy the rest of the teams and head to Naboo for a brief stay before our next mission off Coruscant. I’ll be treating with the queen in Naboo to broker a deal for a new base and to order ships.”

“I thought the Naboo were demilitarized,” Lieutenant Connix broke in.

“They are a peaceful people, but have always been friends of the resistance,” the general explained. “They can provide us a place to regroup and meet with arms dealers out of sight of the First Order - our enemy won’t expect us there since they are a neutral system. In any case, it’s only temporary.” 

Poe pressed a button on a datapad and a holomap projection appeared in front of General Organa. Between the two of them they pointed out which system to drop off the next team of recruiters and gave background on where we would land on Corellia. Connix and Poe argued a bit over the best way to drop off the coaxium, with Poe in favour of flying the Falcon in and out of the city in question as quickly as possible while Connix lobbied for the more cautious route of landing in a forested area far away from civilization and having Crimson Dawn meet them there. Rey listened intently but kept quiet, not having any military experience she coudn’t decide which was less dangerous. Eventually, a vote was held and the consensus was settled on the faster route - they would land in the city. With luck, they would be in and out of Corellia in under an hour.

When they finally dispersed, Rey avoided heading straight to her chambers where the broken lightsaber awaited her. “Come on,” she linked her arm through Finn’s and steered him away to the Dejarik table. “Let’s have a rematch. Maybe you can redeem yourself this time!” 

“Only if you play fair,” Finn pretending to sulk. “How does an average guy stand a chance if you can just use the Force.” 

“I’m telling you, Finn, I don’t read your thoughts you just make terribly obvious plays,” she ribbed in response, happy to have her friend by her side once again.


	3. Chapter 3

“They smashed this before we could confiscate it, sir,” the stormtrooper captain held out his hand to show a shattered homing beacon. Kylo Ren picked it up to get a closer look at the damage, turning it over in his gloved hands before handing it back.

“Bring it to the engineers, see what they can extract from it,” he directed with little confidence that much could be done to salvage it. Hux appeared at his shoulder, the features of his pale face smug with self importance.

“The rebel scum are ready for you now, Supreme Leader,” he gestured for Kylo to follow. Their shoes clicked along the polished black floors of the Finalizer as they made their way to the holding cells.

The human and Dressellian were strapped upright awaiting interrogation when they arrived. Hux ran his tongue along his lip as his eyes hungrily took in their helpless forms. Kylo felt excitement and anticipation radiate from his general. He hated and distrusted the creature, but he acknowledged that his cruelty knew no bounds.

“The last dregs of the resistance,” Kylo stepped towards the prostrate forms that were already bleeding and bruised before him. “Pathetic.”

The sandy-haired human regarded him out of the one eye that wasn’t swollen shut and had the nerve to spit at him, the glob landing on Kylo’s abdomen and earning him a suckerpunch to the jaw from the attendant stormtrooper.

Without another word Kylo reached out to penetrate the rebel’s mind taking care to make it painful and eliciting a scream as he probed deeper. The Dressellian gurgled and fought against his restraints while his partner jerked and screeched. A mix of scenes flashed through Kylo’s mind - the human’s hut on his wet home planet, abject terror and overwhelming grief as resistance escape pods blew up all around his own as they fled from the Raddus, wounded rebels with med pacs inside the Millennium Falcon, Rey embracing his mother - his chest tightened and the connection snapped off at that. 

“Where are they headed? Tell me!” Kylo struggled to keep his voice steady and balled his fists at his sides. “Or should we pay a visit to your sister on Lyta?” 

A well of panic pulsed from within the man but he kept his mouth shut. Kylo went back in and saw it, the rebels gathered around a holomap. The dark haired pilot he tortured to find the map to Skywalker was pointing to Makeb, then FN-2187 stepped forward speaking in agitated tones about enslaved children and zoomed the map in on Canto Bight.

“Change course for Canto Bight,” Kylo said. The rebels doubled their struggles against the restraints, tears now streaming down the human’s face. 

As they turned to leave, a communications officer ran up to Hux. “Sir, we’ve just received word from our forces on Savareen. The Millennium Falcon was spotted - the rebels stole a shipment of coaxium from the docks. Crimson Dawn has put in an urgent request for audience.”

Kylo and Hux sped off to the bridge to take the call, shouting to suspend the coordinates to Canto Bight. On the holo was Qiru, the deceptively sweet looking woman at the head of the syndicate. She inclined her head respectfully to Hux. 

“Explain this!” Hux spat at her.

She frowned, the blue glow of the holo rippling around her petite form. “General Hux, the rebels were gone as quickly as they came. They requested an audience to beg for a loan. They are so desperate that General Organa herself came to me grovelling! I laughed her out of the room of course and ordered her followed. Her visit was a distraction, and as we tailed her they ambushed our freighter crew just before your First Order agents arrived and took the entire shipment of coaxium. 500,000 credits worth!”

“You expect us to believe that,” Kylo said, a statement not a question, his voice flat.

Qiru glanced down her nose at him, lips curling up in a sneer. “Of course, sweetheart. Now let the grown ups talk,” she said before turning her attention back to Hux.

Even Hux had the sense to be shocked. “How dare you address the Supreme Leader in this way!”

Her face immediately transformed in dismay. “Supreme Leader, forgive me, I did not recognize you - your mask - I -” she stammered and dropped her knees, looking to Kylo with round pleading eyes.

“Enough,” he waved away her drabbling. “Was there anyone with General Organa when you met?”

“Yes,” Qiru stayed on her knees. “A girl named Rey.”

His stomach flipped. “Where are they heading?” 

She straightened, smoothing her features to an unreadable mask. “That I don’t know.”

There was a long pause while Kylo’s eyes bore into hers, trying to reach across lightyears to the other side of the hologram. He couldn’t be sure if she was telling the truth, but it would be stupid of her to lie. “Our cut will be double on the next shipment to make up for your failure today,” he nodded to the communications officer to cut the holo. “Bring her to me,” he said to the nearest stormtrooper of rank and turned to Hux. “Stay on course for Canto Bight.”

***

After three long and stressful days being tossed in and out of hyperspeed to disperse recruiters and make the drop on Corellia, which they miraculously pulled off without a hitch, they had finally made it to Naboo, where they were being treated with every courtesy by the queen’s staff. Finn had muttered earlier that that was probably because the Naboo were just glad that they weren’t staying any longer - they were due to pack up and ship out again in the morning. For now, in the waning evening light, Rey was practicing alone with her quarterstaff in a courtyard of the palace when General Organa appeared.

“Mind if we talk?” the general patted the stone bench where she sat and Rey joined her, breathing heavily and wiping sweat from her brow.

“Of course,” Rey huffed. “What is it? Is everything alright?” Concern gripped her.

“That’s what I’m wondering about you,” the general regarded her closely. 

Rey looked down at her hands where they lay empty and upturned in her lap and sighed. 

“There’s been a shadow hanging over you now that wasn’t there before you left to find Luke. We still haven’t talked about what happened while you were gone. We don’t have to, if you don’t want to, but it might help to share whatever it is that you’re going through right now,” Leia took her hand in her own and peered kindly into her face.

She paused for several long moments. “I left Luke...to go to your son.”

It was only for the briefest of moments, but Leia looked as though she’d been struck before her features settled into warm concern. 

“We’d been seeing each other...almost like visions, but it was real. I could never see his surroundings but he would be in the room, as physically present as you are now,” she tried her best to explain. “I could feel the conflict in him, there was so much Darkness but I could feel his doubt, could feel him being pulled to the Light. I thought I could make him turn, and for a moment I thought I had. He killed Snoke - not me. He did it to save me. But then, he asked me to join him on the Dark Side. He let the fleet be wiped out, we fought over the lightsaber and it split just before the Raddus crashed through the Supremacy. I left. I failed. I failed him.” Her voice shook with emotion as the memories flooded back.

Leia was quiet, her sorrow a barely contained throb beside Rey. “No,” she shook her head. “It’s the other way around. He failed you.”

It was Rey’s turn to shake her head. “You didn’t feel it - the betrayal. He was so hurt.”

“Has it happened again, these visions?”

“No,” Rey tried and failed not to sound disappointed by this.

“Good,” General Organa said, the firm set of her shoulders returning. Leia, the mother of Ben Solo, was being pushed away. General Organa, leader of the galaxy’s last hope against the tyranny of the First Order, was stepping back in control. “Kylo Ren has made his choice. It’s time that we made ours. If we are to win this fight, we need you Rey. You are the last Jedi now.”

“I’ll never be a Jedi,” Rey’s shoulders slumped. “I can’t fix the lightsaber. And I can’t control the Force, there’s so much I don’t know. I didn’t have enough time with Luke and now I’ll never have a teacher.”

“I can’t teach you the ways of the Force, but I think there’s a way to fix the lightsaber,” General Organa said. Rey listened as she told of the crystal cave where Luke took the students of his Jedi temple to make their own lightsabers. Hope bloomed in Rey’s chest for the first time since she left Acho-To.


	4. Chapter 4

Hovering just outside Canto Bight’s atmosphere, Kylo Ren sat cross legged in his ship’s chambers, eyes closed and feet bare. The room couldn’t help but look dark, decked out as it was in all black furnishings, metal panelling and floors, but the effect was deepened further by the dimmed lights. He breathed deeply, his exhales lasting longer than his inhales. The Dark Side of the Force ebbed and flowed all around him but his mind was blessedly blank. Everything else fell away, even the Darkness, and he felt nothing but balance and release.

A calm peace welled up inside him - it felt foreign, but good, and he leaned into it. The Light Side of the Force beckoned to him, whispering promises of redemption and forgiveness. It’s too late the Dark Side whispered back and he recoiled at the image of his father’s heartbroken face when the lightsaber impaled him. Anguish flooded back, choking him. He snapped his eyes open and she was there.

***

The ancient Jedi texts that she stole from Ach-To lay open in her lap where she sat curled up in the bed of her chambers on Naboo. It was dense reading, and Rey had read the same passage over and over until her thoughts drifted back to the escape from Savareen. The Jedi texts told her to seek serenity in all things and made no space for the realities of war. She had to kill those TIE fighter pilots - didn’t she? 

She felt raw power flare up inside of her at the thought. It was intoxicating and she drank it in, feeling her command of the Force grow the more she meditated on the fear of the battle and destruction of enemy ships...and death. She lurched forward, head reeling with the Dark, hating herself for enjoying this and hating Luke for not teaching her how to control it, hating the resistance for placing so much expectation on her shoulders - she would only let them down - and hating Kylo Ren for drawing out her connection to the Force all that time ago on Starkiller base when he probed her mind.

His face filled her mind, his beautiful brown eyes, so vulnerable and pleading, and her heart ached with compassion. She wanted to soothe his wounded soul with kindness and light, there was hope there, she saw it and felt it as the Light Side obliterated the Dark. She blinked, but his eyes were still there, crying out for her help.

***

They said nothing for what felt like an eternity but simply stared into each other’s eyes, both of them breathing heavily in the aftershocks of the Force that still swirled all around them.

They took each other in; Kylo Ren sat cross legged and appeared as a blot of black in his simple tunic, loose pants, and inky mop of hair that only served to emphasize the pale skin of his exposed face, hands, and feet. Seeing his flesh so exposed like this, it was hard for Rey to reconcile this intense youth with the masked creature who chased her through the woods. He drank her in, eyes slowly moving over her loose brown tresses and the plain linen pyjamas she pulled on before curling up under the covers. Could he tell she was in bed? A flush crept up her neck. 

“If I could kill you right now I would,” he finally spoke.

“For someone so powerful with the Force you’d think you would be better at lying,” Rey said tartly.

“Where are you?” he nudged her mind with his, trying to sneak past her defenses.

“Right in front of you.”

“I had an interesting chat today with a pair of buffoons we picked up on Makeb,” he said. “They were so easy to break that it was boring, made me nostalgic for when it was you I had in my interview chair.”

He shared the sight of the rebels she knew as Billy and Heepa tied up and bleeding and Rey’s stomach dropped.

“At least you tried to put up a fight,” he continued. He was goading her, poking around in her mind and planting images of horrible things that he’d done. He wanted to get her angry enough to hate him but Rey felt how much it hurt him to see her. 

You are nothing....but not to me. 

“I’m so sorry,” she said sadly.

He flinched, the pain evident in his features no matter how hard he tried to hide it. “Don’t,” his voice was hard.

She looked down, not able to bear what she saw in his eyes as tears threatened to spill from her own. His conflict was eating her up on the inside. She called to him through their bond and she knew he could feel it. This time it was her reaching out and pleading for him to join her. Please. She felt his heart rending while the Darkness enveloped him like a shroud trying to pull him back. 

When she looked up she was alone.


	5. Chapter 5

Qiru sat across a chrome table picking nervously at a hangnail when Kylo Ren entered the spartan room in the bowels of the Finalizer. He stuffed down his swirling emotions from the encounter with Rey and hoped that nothing out of order was showing on his face. The small brown-haired woman quickly stopped at the sight of him, and instead lightly clasped her pale hands together and brought them to rest on the table, all the while intently taking in his tall form and the mop of shaggy hair that framed his face. 

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you face to face,” she said softly. “Supreme Leader.”

“Oh? I believe the pleasure is all yours,” Kylo said, adjusting his cape as he took the seat across from her. Her eyes flashed with annoyance.

“The fools who were in charge of the docks that day have all been taken care of,” she said, her voice was edged with malice. “Believe me, Crimson Dawn does not suffer mistakes.”

“That’s just it though, I don’t believe you,” Kylo leaned forward as he spoke and squeezed her throat through the Force just enough to see the fear register in her eyes. “Crimson Dawn has always been tied to a larger network, call it the Sith, the Empire, or now the First Order, but always begrudgingly so. Always the attitude with you dogs.”

She made wet choking sounds but stared into his eyes defiantly until he released his grip. Spluttering and gasping for air, her hands shot up to massage her slender throat while Kylo waited for her to regain command of her usually impeccable poise. He didn’t need to use any sort of power to see that she seemed to be calculating her next move as she stole glances from under her long lashes in between dry, rasping coughs.

“Alright,” she said and after the coughing died down and Kylo remained silent. “I do know something...they’ll be in the Coruscant atmosphere tomorrow. I know I should have told you straight out-” she held her hands up in defense, urging him to hear her out. “-I saw an opportunity and ran with it. I figured, with the First Order unit stationed at Coruscant so distracted, we could sneak out some contraband - slaves, precision canons, that sort of thing. You know, without the First Order cut we could sell it at a premium and double our profits.” Her voice took on a dreamy quality when she said this last part, as if imagining herself lying on a bed of credits.

“Why would they go to Coruscant?” Kylo barked and banged his fists on the table, making Qiru jump. There was still something she was holding back. “It’s occupied by the First Order, and the resistance is not that stupid.”

“I told them to,” Qiru replied. “I told Leia Organa that if they created a distraction off Coruscant, Crimson Dawn would provide them with ships.”

Kylo could sense that much, at least, was true.

Qiru looked sheepishly up at him while wringing her hands. “This is a grave betrayal of your trust, Supreme Leader, I know that...but you must know that Crimson Dawn will always support your bottom line. I will always side with you, when the real moment comes,” her voice held steady.

Kylo considered his options. Even without digging into her memories of her meeting with Rey and his mother, which he sincerely did not want to deal with, he knew Qiru was holding back critical information, most likely that she cut a bigger deal with the Resistance. It really wasn’t surprising- the Crimson Dawn was a money making scheme after all and only fear kept them under the First Order’s control. But if he killed her, he would have to deal with the bravado of a new syndicate head trying to prove themselves (and the guilt, came a tiny voice from the back of his mind). But if he let her go at least he knew where this particular snake holed up.

After a deliberately long and uncomfortable pause he relented. “I won’t scour the recesses of your mind...this time. If what you say is indeed true then you have nothing to fear,” he rose to leave. “You can return to Savareen for now. Just know that it takes more than a confession to return to the good graces of the First Order- you’re lucky I don’t replace you immediately.”

He shut the door in her face as she hurried forward spewing platitudes of thanks and loyalty. Hux had just rounded the corner and rushed forward to meet him, face alight with eagerness. “Well?” he said. “Is it done or do I need to order her execution?”

“She lives,” Kylo replied, not bothering to stop and forcing Hux to scurry after him as he strode down the hall back to the bridge. “For now.”

Angry red blotches bloomed on Hux’s pale face. “You cannot possibly expect us to let this one go! She clearly set up the coaxium heist on Savareen - it has Crimson Dawn’s greedy little paw prints all over it! You’ve allowed yourself to be bested by a pretty girl, again!”

Hux went flying across the hall, hitting the opposite wall with a crash that shattered the reinforced aluminum paneling and leaving the circuitry behind hanging exposed through the cracks. Kylo’s lightsaber crackled to life, and the red glow illuminated Hux where he lay huddled in a groaning puddle on the floor. Kylo pointed the tip at Hux and slowly leaned forward, all the while shaking with rage, until the heat of the laser caused beads of sweat to appear on the prone man’s cheek. Hux’s mouth hung agape, his eyes going almost cross-eyed they were so intently fixed on the lightsaber. Kylo took a deep breath, and as he exhaled, he closed the gap, mastering his urge to hack this worm to pieces right then and there, and instead contented himself with pressing the tip of the lightsaber to his impertinent general’s nearly translucent cheek, letting the bloodcurdling scream and smell of roasting flesh wash over him.

Pulling away, the urge to eviscerate his general persisted, so he slashed at the walls, the doors, a passing droid. An idea came to him and with a flick of his fingers, he unlocked the holding cell door. He stood amidst the smoke and sparks of the wreckage, with Hux still wailing at his feet, hands clamped over his raw left cheek. Qiru poked her head out, eyes as round as saucers. 

“Increase oversight of Crimson Dawn however you want,” he turned off his lightsaber and pushed the hair out of his eyes. “But I seem to be in a forgiving mood today, so I’ll give Qiru and you both the chance to redeem yourselves.” He looked up from Hux’s snivelling form to Qiru, who had stepped into the hallway, her eyes flitting over the scene of destruction before locking onto Kylo Ren. “You caught me on a good day - I’m not usually this kind.”


	6. Chapter 6

“You sure you want to go alone?” Finn said, a crease forming between his brows, betraying his anxiety.

“Well, no, not really,” Rey replied, but her voice was lighthearted and she was smiling, albeit a little sadly. “But honestly, it will probably be boring. I’ll just be fiddling with parts all day.”

“Don’t even try to spin this like it’s not the coolest thing ever,” Finn rolled his eyes. “You’re going to learn the Jedi secrets of making lightsabers, in a cave made of crystal.”

“When you put it like that...okay, I’ll admit it beats cleaning rusty circuit boards on Jakku,” Excitement seeping through, Rey jogged on the spot a little as she spoke, sporting a huge comical grin on her face.

Finn groaned jealously. “Bring me with you!”

She ceased jogging and the grin faded back into a sad smile. “The Resistance needs you, Finn. Rose needs you.”

A soberness settled over Finn when she spoke, and he looked over his shoulder to where Rose was perched on a crate next to Poe and Connix, who were arguing about the best way to cheat at cards. As if she could feel his gaze, she turned their way and smiled when she caught his eye. His eyes lit up and he couldn’t help but grin in return. 

Rey eyed them curiously. Rose had healed almost instantaneously once they hooked her up to a medpac, but that hadn’t stopped Finn from fluttering around the small girl, constantly asking after her comfort level and generally treating her like a piece of precious porcelain. What surprised Rey more was that Rose seemed to enjoy the close attention, and she had walked in on them standing close and flushing deeply on more than one occasion- it was impossible not to on such a crowded ship.

“Mistress Rey, your presence has been requested in the cockpit,” the gold protocol droid C-3PO said as he waddled over.

“Ok,” Rey replied. “Be there in a minute.”

She turned back to Finn, whose full attention was on her once again. “Are we there already?” he asked, taken aback.

“Must be. Look,” she pointed out the window to the pair of moons visible in the distance. The ice planet Ilum was dotted with caves where Jedis in training would be sent to harvest kyber crystals for their lightsabers. General Organa had said as much during their respite on Naboo, and Rey had found passages in the Jedi texts that confirmed it, complete with intricate diagrams of lightsaber construction. The kyber crystal from Luke’s lightsaber still radiated energy, but it was split and she couldn’t get the blade to ignite. A new krystal could be the answer to the puzzle and, Rey hoped, a fresh start.

Finn opened and closed his mouth, looking for the right words. 

“I know,” Rey said and put her hand on his arm. “I don’t want to say goodbye again so soon either. But it won’t be for long, I hope.”

“Hey, I get it, you’re going on a Jedi quest” he said. “You’re gonna miss out on messing with the First Order off Coruscant though.”

“Be careful tomorrow,” she urged. “Corellia was lucky. This mission might not be so easy.”

“I’m a lucky guy,” he said. Rey noticed that his eyes flicked over to Rose as he spoke. “I’ll find you before you board the shuttle, ok?”

Rey nodded and gave his arm a squeeze, then headed to the cockpit where she found General Organa sitting next to Chewie in the copilot seat.

“Ah, there you are,” General Organa said. “Do you have everything you need?”

“Shuttle’s packed and ready to go,” Rey replied and absentmindedly touched the homing beacon on her wrist. It was the same one the general had given her the first time she left on Jedi business.

“Excellent,” the General nodded approvingly. “I’m glad we have one to spare for you, thanks to the Crimson Dawn credits and the connections we were able to make on Naboo.” 

The Naboo couldn’t directly support them, but they had put the Resistance in touch with a broker who secured fighter jets as well as a handful of simple shuttles on their behalf. Rey was taking the last of the shuttles since the rest were already out on recruiting missions. The thought painfully reminded Rey of how Kylo Ren taunted her about capturing Billy and Heepa. She hadn’t told the general about seeing her son again and she struggled with the urge to confess. Should they attempt a rescue mission? Her gut knotted in a ball of guilt, but she had no idea if the two were even still alive.

“I know, it’s a nasty business,” General Organa misread the burgeoning distress that must have crossed Rey’s features. “I don’t like taking Qiru’s dirty credits but,” she held her hands up, resigned. “That’s what war is made of. Dirty, uncomfortable decisions for the benefit of the greater good.”

At first imagining the general had read her thoughts about Kylo, she inwardly let out a sigh of relief when that’s how her guilt was interpreted. “You must be looking forward to being done with those gangsters after tomorrow,” Rey offered. Chewie made a disgruntled sound, and Rey flipped a couple of switches on the copilot side that were out of his reach. They were slowing down.

General Organa let out a loud sigh. “Yes, I really am. I won’t be pushing for that starship after all. Our next step will instead be to find a suitable base. We need to get off this ship!”

A stray Porg lept onto the dash and, as if in agreement, let out a powerful squawk. 

General Organa boosted herself up out of the seat, leaning heavily on the cane she always used now. “It’s time. I’ll walk you to the shuttle.”

Chewie let out a mournful bale, leaping up and wrapping her in a furry hug before letting her go. “Don’t let these guys push you around,” she nodded at the Porg, who hopped into the copilot seat and proceeded to urinate on it. Chewie roared at it, causing it to scamper, screeching, out of the cockpit. 

Finn, Poe, Rose and Connix were already at the loading bay when she and the general reached it. While they were still out of earshot, General Organa grasped Rey’s forearm and whispered, leaning forward, “Remember what we talked about. He’s made his choice - keep your mind clear and don’t let him manipulate you.”

A queer feeling lurched in her gut at that, but she nodded anyway, and gave a tight-lipped smile. 

Rey embraced each one of her new friends, saying goodbye to Finn last. “Be careful tomorrow,” she urged a final time before hopping into the shuttle. She waved at them all as the hatch opened, and then she was off.

The surface of Ilum was dotted with angry red pockmarks. Wasn’t this supposed to be an ice planet? Rey wondered what could have caused those ugly gashes. They must be huge, to be visible from this distance. They were like open wounds and she was picking up waves of unstable Force energy. Something cataclysmic happened here. The chaotic frequency was not unlike Kylo’s signature in the Force, she thought, and the gashes were like the scar she had given his face. She’d marked him forever that day, but he left his own mark on her soul since the connection reopened. Rey was aching to see him again, to reach out and touch him.

She let out a frustrated huff, annoyed with her inability to leave it alone. She was treading dangerous territory. She shook her head as if shaking off flies, vainly trying to shake off the hold that Kylo Ren seemed to have on her, and began the descent to Ilum.


	7. Chapter 7

Kylo wished he’d stayed behind on Canto Bight with the small detachment of stormtroopers ordered to continue the hunt for Resistance recruiters on that planet. The Finalizer was hurtling through hyperspace toward Coruscant, and even though he was so close to realizing his goal of finally destroying the last vestiges of the rebellion, instead all he felt was blinding panic. The walls were closing in on him, he couldn’t get enough air no matter how many deep breaths he forced himself to take.

He didn’t feel this way when he had them in his grip on Crait. Then, he’d been too overcome with emotion in the aftermath of being rejected by Rey, and he was then also better able to channel the feeling into rage and drew strength from that. But now, it was as though the longer he went without Snoke’s influence, the softer he was becoming. His mother and Rey would be on his father’s hunk of junk freighter, and he knew it would be harder to take them out, knowing what he did now about how it feels to murder someone you can’t help but feel a deep connection to. He didn’t know if he had it in him to tear his heart out a second time.

In his chambers getting ready, he fastened the clasp of his cape with shaking fingers and wiped his clammy palms on his breeches. Checking his reflection in a mirror while affixing his lighsaber to his belt, he was relieved that at least he didn’t appear panicked. His pale face was an unreadable mask, the dark circles under red rimmed eyes the only evidence of his uneasy conscience.

He left his chambers and made his way through the serpentine hallways and lifts that led to the bridge. On the way he passed a group of slow moving officers who were discussing a holo that projected from one of their datapads. Kylo snatched the datapad out of the junior officer’s gloved hand for his own use while they were mid conversation without so much as looking them in the eye as he did so. The group stopped and gaped after him, his polished black boots clacking as he strode off, fingers typing and swiping lazily on the datapad. He drew up a report on the slave trade and was impressed to see that slavery rates had declined dramatically on all First Order occupied planets since occupation began. Arrests for piracy and smuggling were high, if you didn’t count systems where they had arrangements with crime syndicates. This is the sort of thing he could take pride in - order through strength was finally being brought to the galaxy.

Everyone in the galaxy, from the Core Planets to the Outer Rim, benefitted from the kind of security only a massive organization like the First Order could provide. It was time for fresh, unified leadership in the galaxy. The Resistance would always undermine them - they had to be destroyed.

He could do this. He had to.

He tossed the datapad at a dull grey, two-legged protocol droid shuffling past, and ignored its gasp when it fumbled, dropping the unit. The tinny echoes of its grovelling followed him for the final stretch of the journey.

Reaching the bridge, he saw Hux back in action, dressed impeccably as usual in his general’s uniform as if nothing had happened, but when the detestable man turned, bringing the round red scab on his cheek into view, Kylo couldn’t help but smirk. While this Coruscant mission was tying his gut in knots, that exercise in Dark Side power had been exhilarating. 

“General,” Kylo said, making no attempt to hide his smirk.

Hux’s eyes flicked over to him and he scowled deeply, then flinched, the action clearly causing him pain. “Supreme Leader,” his voice was clipped and full of hatred. 

An almost imperceptible shudder ran through the ship and for a split second Kylo felt suspended and weightless, while the stars appeared as long, frozen beams of white light, and in the next moment they were out of hyperspace. Coruscant floated below, its surface glittering with billions of city lights. He hated this planet. So populous, nearly every inch of it was crawling with people, mostly humans, and you could never get a moment alone. It was the galaxy’s undisputed center of art, education, and entertainment, but it was one of those places that emphasized how alone he always felt, even though he was never physically alone.

Cold hatred radiated off General Hux. “Ready all heavy artillery and deploy TIE fighters,” spittle flew from his mouth as he barked the order. Around them, officers punched the codes into the command center.

“We shouldn’t have come in the Finalizer. It’s too conspicuous, the moment they spot us they’ll just jump right back into hyperspace,” Kylo said. His chest was tight again, he couldn’t get enough air.

“That’s why we called in the Interdictor,” Hux retorted. “Obviously.”

The Interdictor could scramble the rebel ship’s signals, preventing their crew from making the accurate calculations that were essential to making a safe hyperspace jump. The slightest miscalculation would be deadly- they could smash into another ship, an asteroid belt, or find themselves sucked into a black hole. As if on cue, the long, triangular frigate in question popped out of hyperspace a short distance away. “Good,” was all he could spit out. Damn that scavenger! He was so unbalanced he couldn’t even manage a snide remark to put Hux in his place.

They stood in awkward silence for several long minutes, staring out the observation deck into open space. There was no telling how long it would take for the rebels to arrive, or indeed if they would even show up at all. Perhaps they’d finally found some integrity and told Qiru to shove it, Kylo mused. An unfamiliar sensation, hope, fluttered in his chest at that. 

This was unacceptable! He was the Supreme Leader, he couldn’t afford to allow Light Side qualities like hope to take root. He reached out and pulled the Darkness around him like a blanket, internally begging Darth Vader to give him the strength required to see this through.

“The ship is yours,” he mumbled reluctantly as he turned back the way he came only moments before, without sparing a glance for his General. Hux bored a hole in the back of his head with cold pale eyes. Kylo was heading for his shuttle. He was unsure of his own resolve but knew Hux wouldn’t hesitate to pull the trigger, this was after all the heartless beast who condemned the entire Hosnian system, so he would remove himself and trust his cur to do the dirty work at hand.

Though as he walked across the bridge and felt Hux’s eyes on his back, he had the feeling that if the opportunity presented itself, his General would take gladly take him out along with the rest. 

***

“With all due respect General, they’re only credits,” Lieutenant Connix’s voice was soft as she spoke, and not unkind. “We can still call off the mission if you’re having doubts.” Loose strands of yellow blonde hair escaped from her double buns, evidence of the crew’s habit of sleeping rough on crates and not enough freshers for the amount of people on board.

General Organa gave a small shake of her head. Her face appeared to sport more wrinkles now than it did only a short time ago, and though the woman looked as regal as ever in her grey and purple military garb, she seemed to be shrinking by the day, as if the weight of responsibility were crushing her slowly into the ground. The hard set of her mouth, however, betrayed nothing but determination.

“There will always be doubts, Lieutenant,” she said. “A leader who never frets about their decisions, and the impact those decisions will have on the lives in their care, is being irresponsible. But the fact of the matter is, this is about more than credits. This mission will give us the freedom to build a new base - a place of refuge to store our new fleet, to train our new recruits, and to finally rest and grieve. We need to make landfall - the Falcon can’t support us much longer.”

Connix noticed the way the corners of the general’s mouth drooped as she spoke and suspected that her personal reasons for wanting to disembark her husband’s ship also played a role. 

They were standing in the viewport at the front of the Falcon, overlooking the swirling black and white of hyperspace, but with one last glance out the window, General Organa seemed to gather herself and stood a little taller. Head held high, she walked the short distance to the lounge, where all available crew were gathered, Connix following two steps behind.

“Rebels,” General Organa began. She paused, surveying the faces before her and the range of emotions they presented. There was resolve, courage, and unmistakable anxiety, but all looked to her with a spark of hope in their eyes. “We are about to engage the enemy on unknown terms. We can’t be certain how many ships they will have, or what kind of weaponry, or how long we’ll be there, but we’re ready for anything. You all know the plan, and your role during this mission.” Her brown eyes came to rest on Commander Dameron. 

Poe ran a hand through his dark curls and cleared his throat as he stepped forward.

“The general is right,” he said, coming to stand at her side. “We don’t know what’s on the other side of the jump, but I want everyone to know that I stand by the decision to leave our new X-wings behind. We can’t risk getting our last pilots picked off, so it’s all or nothing. Yes, the Falcon is gonna take some hits- engineers and mechanics, you know your stations. Chewie and me are in the cockpit, Finn’s on the lower cannon and C'ai’s in the top gun well.” He looked around the rapt faces before pulling up ground coordinates on the holo and adding, “If it all goes sideways, and we need to make an emergency landing or abandon ship, remember to scatter and regroup at the meeting point, here, one full cycle after landfall.” He pointed to a point on the map, a shipyard located deep in a warehousing district of Coruscant. He stepped back and nodded to the general.

“May the-” General Organa began, but stopped abruptly as the sound of Chewie hollering vehemently from the cockpit reached them. It was time. “To your stations!”

It was a blur of orange and beige jumpsuits as rebels scrambled around each other, sprinting criss-cross through the lounge to their assigned posts. 

Finn had just strapped himself into the gunner seat when he felt the familiar jerk of the Falcon exiting hyperspace. His heart was racing and his blood was already up, he was panting from running here and adrenaline and cortisol was flooding his body. He was more excited than scared, almost looking forward to the thrill of giving chase. That is, until he saw a battalion of First Order ships to the right - completely within firing range.

“It’s the Finalizer! Kylo Ren’s battleship!” he shouted into the comm.

Within seconds, canon fire blasted what seemed like every possible inch of the Falcon’s shields. They would never hold under a bombardment this heavy, and he heard the dissonant clamour of warning alarms ringing out from another part of the ship, but he couldn’t pay attention to that now, not when a dozen TIE fighters came screaming into view. He sprayed gunfire at them wildly, swivelling the gunner seat back and forth, trying to anticipate their position as the ship dove deep then abruptly pivoted, away from the main cluster of starships.

“Damnit! That witch Qiru gave us up,” General Organa swore. She was in the cockpit, gripping the back of Poe’s seat.

“Strap in, General, it’s going to be a rough ride,” Poe turned his head slightly as he spoke, but his eyes were busy flicking between the shield power monitor and the advancing pack of TIE fighters. Chewie let out a cry that reverberated through the cockpit, and thrust the throttle to the side, bringing them vertical so that Finn’s lower gun well could engage the buzzing TIEs. They heard Finn whoop from below when a burst of flame erupted from one of the round black fighters as it took a hit, and it clipped a second as it careened uncontrollably off course.

“Abandon the mission - get us out of here,” General Organa ordered instead of heeding his advice. She stayed on her feet, swaying with the rocking of the ship, one hand white knuckling the back of Poe’s seat and the other steadying herself with her cane.

Chewie grumbled long and loud. “We’re stuck as long as we’re in range of that Interdictor,” Poe explained. “It’d be suicide to attempt a hyperspace jump while it’s intercepting our signals.”

They were descending quickly, the lights of the city rushing up to meet them. 

“You’re bringing us into the atmosphere?” 

“Buying time for the engineers,” he replied. “One of our flux stabilizers is down, and the power converter is at risk of burning out next.”

A second, ominous emergency alarm rang out alongside a hiss of decompressing air, the warning peals clashing at opposing intervals. Behind them, the Interdictor and Finalizer hovered menacingly, their canonfire still battering their shields. 

“Fly smart, Commander. Chewie, you know what to do,” the General said before pulling herself out the door to check on the rest of the crew.

Two crew members, pilots without their wings, ran past carrying armfuls of parts and tools. The click of her cane was muffled as she stepped through a cloud of steam. The general nodded at three mechanics standing tall just outside the entrance to the power core. They saluted her in return, their faces taut and eyes wide, but whatever anxieties they must be feeling were otherwise under control. “Keep to your post,” she said to them, although she knew they would standby without her telling them, ready to jump to action should any part of the core lose power. 

“Yes, General!” they said in unison.

Connix had commandeered the dejarik table and turned it into a comms hub. Holos of each major power station, fuel reserve, as well as the gun wells and cockpit projected in front of her on the makeshift control deck. She was expertly commanding the crew, constantly scanning for weak points in each station and briskly rhyming off orders into the comm unit she held aloft. General Organa hovered only for a moment, listening as her lieutenant dispatched for a coolant refill in the upper gun well. Connix, something of a protege to the general, was more than capable and it was clear she had everything under control here, so the general made to head deeper into the ship.

She felt him before she saw his shuttle through the viewport. Of course he would be here if the Finalizer was so close at hand, but even with advance warning, it still felt like a knife was being twisted in her heart. Ben. Her boy, her baby who she carried and nursed and loved so much it hurt. She couldn’t help but think of him as he was- a fat, delightful cherub, cooing into her chest, looking up at her under impossibly long black lashes, drool dripping from his toothless grin.

He shoved a lightsaber into his father’s gut.

Her knees gave way at the same moment the Falcon flipped once more and she went down, hard, grunting on impact with the cold metal floor. Pain shot up her arm and she cried out - her right arm was twisted under her in an unnatural angle, heat spreading out from just above her wrist. 

“General!” Connix screeched and ran to squat at her side.Snaking an arm under her torso, Connix gently coaxed General Organa onto her back, who sharply sucked in air between her teeth at the movement and gingerly cradled her arm.

“I’m alright,” she insisted and tried to haul herself up to sit.

“Your arm! I think it’s broken - I’ll get a med pac.”

“No, stay,” the general grabbed her arm when she made to leave. “I’ll manage it. I need you here in command.”

Connix frowned, her gaze shifting from General Organa to the flickering holos at her little command post. Someone was calling for her on the comms unit that she still held, the sound barely audible over the din of alarm bells and the constant rumbling of canonfire hitting the shields.

“I’ll be fine,” the General repeated. She reached her good hand up, Connix hesitated for a second before taking it to help her back to her feet then bent to pick up the general’s cane. “You’ve got everything under control?”

“Yes, General,” Connix replied and handed her the cane.

General Organa just nodded and slowly walked away on her way to find a medpac for her throbbing wrist. Her eyes kept drifting back to the viewport, to the black TIE silencer racing beside them.

Sharp, hot pain radiated from her wrist, which was swelling fast, and waves of nausea washed over her. She took one last look out the window; they were in the clouds now but even so that meant they were dodging speeders and impossibly tall skyscrapers. Coruscant was so densely urban that practically nobody ever truly touched the planet’s surface. They were in the topmost layer of the city, whipping in and out of wispy clouds, so that Kylo Ren’s fighter would peek out for a split second before disappearing again behind a wall of white.

One of their canons nailed a direct hit on a TIE not a hundred yards away and it exploded in a burst of flame. A hunk of debris narrowly missed a building spire, smashing instead into a landing pad and destroying several parked ships. “This is insanity,” General Organa muttered under her breath. 

She picked up her pace, desperate now to slap a medpac on her wrist and get back in action.

***

How that rickety old thing was managing to outmaneuver the latest class of First Order fighters, Kylo had no idea. The thought was pissing him off - his TIEs were sleek, beautiful menaces of the sky but they were also top of the line and perfectly engineered to have the fastest, most precise flight navigation systems the galaxy has ever seen. Many died in pursuit of the honour of becoming a First Order TIE pilot during the dangerous training drills. Only the very best aces in the flight academy made TIE pilot status.

And yet, here they were, being picked off by the Millennium Falcon. It was nothing more than junkyard scrap, but it somehow elegantly dipped and dove and swerved around every sudden impossible obstacle in the higher levels of Coruscant proper.

Meanwhile his rigorously trained pilots crashed into landing pads and each other, and couldn’t land a decent hit to bring down that stupid freighter’s shields.

He roared and yanked the throttle to the side, pulling in for a broadside hit, firing for all he was worth, looking for a weak spot in the shields. 

Seeing that rust bucket make a mockery of his fleet pissed him off enough to steel his resolve, and the small alarmed voice in the back of his mind, urging stop, it’s Mom, was growing fainter which each impressive move the Falcon made. His hatred and rage exploded with each of his jets that did the same.

His volley appeared to have no effect and the Falcon made another maddenly successful insane move, nosediving deeper into the planet’s urban core. He followed, easily keeping pace while his remaining TIEs lagged. He brought a gloved hand up to his face and worked his jaw, noticing his face was sore and wondered how long he’d been grinding his teeth.

There were lanes of freeway speeder traffic rushing up to meet them, and on either side residential towers spilled light from seemingly infinite windows and balconies. All around him the planet was bursting with life in a blur of colours and lights and noise. The Falcon sped for the minutest break in the traffic lane, pivoting at the last second, barely avoiding a violet two-seater containing two very fat and terrified yellow Twi'leks. Kylo looped around sideways, coming out under the first traffic lane and circling back under a second perpendicular lane. 

The blur of the lights was blinding and he almost collided with a speeder bike that shot out from around a building. He lost sight of the Falcon and cursed.

Swerving away from the freeway, he cruised between towers. His eyes scanned the gaps between skyscrapers and he reached out through the Force, feeling for any familiar imprints. His mother was nearby, he could faintly make her energy out from amongst the millions of other lifeforms surrounding him from virtually every angle. So much life, all clamouring together and hungrily grabbing at each other, seeking validation and fulfillment. It was draining, and fogging his clarity. The Falcon was near, but he couldn’t pinpoint where. 

And he realized now, reaching out for her, that the scavenger was strangely absent. Curious, is she blocking him out? He wondered. Surely she should be with the main squadron of rebel scum, they wouldn’t waste their best asset on a lowly recruiting mission.

Where the hell were they! They wouldn’t dare make landfall here. It was only a matter of time before a First Order agent or loyal citizen spotted them and gave them up.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of something other than the artificial lights spewing out of buildings and advertising holos. He pulled around to investigate, and noticed a trail of smoke snaking around a corner.

A thrill went through him when he saw a TIE speed after the smoke trail and he rammed the throttle forward, shooting over to meet them. The smoke trail led to the Falcon, zig-zagging in and out of sight. The TIE fighter fired off another round and they hit with a bang that reverberated through the air, causing another plume of smoke to waft from the back end of the ship. Their shields were finally down - his thumb hovered over the trigger for his own blasters. Beads of sweat were forming on his upper lip. 

The TIE fighter beside him let off another blast that ripped a part off the top half of the ship that Kylo knew to be their upper gun well. Bile rose in his throat. His thumb still hovered over the trigger.

The tinny voice of a squadron leader came from his comm. There were more fighters on their way, although they were still a long way off yet. Kylo realized with a twinge of surprise that Hux was failing miserably, considering how few fighters were released at the start. He might underestimate the rebels but, still, it wasn’t like him to hold back. Or, shame welled up inside him as he thought it, his general knew Kylo had taken his own ship into the fray and had overestimated the Supreme Leader.

Overcome with self-loathing, he pressed the trigger.

His blast smashed into the ship’s backend and sent it spinning. A strangled gasp ripped from his throat as he hit a wall of utter panic that wasn’t his own. Pain shot through his left wrist and his head, and he was hit with a fleeting vision: bodies on the floor, unconscious or dead he couldn’t be sure, his mother fluttering her eyelids from where she was sprawled among them with a bacta patch on her arm and blood dripping from a gash on her temple.

Regret tore through him and he gagged, unable to stop from dry retching. 

The TIE beside him fired again but narrowly missed, and before he knew what he was doing, Kylo swung his silencer around and pounded it with his lasers until it was nothing but pieces of metal raining down on the speeders below. His ears were filled with an animalistic scream that he didn’t realize as his own right away.

Panic was still pulsing through his veins but this time he knew it was his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took longer than I'd like to get this chapter finished but I hope it was worth the wait! It's going to be another few weeks for the next one since I'm going on vacation and not bringing my laptop along. This is my first fanfic, so kudos and comments are super appreciated, they mean a lot.


	8. Chapter 8

“Talk to me, Connix,” Poe said, pressing down on the comm button with one callused finger. “What’s the damage?” 

Chewie howled beside him and the rebel commander shushed him harshly through clenched teeth and wiped sweat from his brow with a sleeve. They were juddering through mid-level Coruscant, trailing smoke and debris in their wake, bright red alarm lights flashing across a number of key sectors on the dash.

“The upper gun well is completely gone,” Lieutenant Connix’s voice issued from the speaker. He knew this, he’d felt it go almost as soon as their shields went down, but Poe still flinched at the admission. “A portion of the cargo hold is caved in, and our backup generator is down. We’ve lost Cai, and almost certainly the rest of Delta Force, who were stationed in the damaged hold - I can’t get any signal from them. There are some injuries. A lot of crew were thrown pretty hard from the last impact, including General Organa.”

“Is she alright?” 

There was a pause. His thick eyebrows drew together.

“I’m fine,” the General’s voice issued over the speaker, insistent, but also shaky. “We’re not out of this fight yet.”

Poe let out the breath he’d been holding with a sigh.

It was true. They were still zooming along, dodging speeders and buildings at reckless speeds, but there were no more TIE fighters on their tail. While they were spinning out from the blast that collapsed the cargo hold, Poe saw the last one that had been following them go up in flames. He caught sight of Kylo Ren’s silencer next to it as it smouldered for a split second before Chewie jerked the throttle and threw them behind a screen of fluffy cloud cover. Their radar was still working, and just as they regained control of the spinning Falcon it had picked up on a fresh squadron of First Order battle jets heading towards Kylo’s ship.

No, they weren’t out of this fight yet.

“We’re not out of range of the Interdictor either,” Poe grumbled, keying a code into the diagnostic panel. “Looks like the engineers were able to get the flux stabilizers back up - at least there’s that. But even if we could get a clear signal, I wouldn’t take the risk of a hyperspace jump. Not when the Falcon’s this damaged.”

A shadow fell over the cockpit when they suddenly popped out the other side of the cloud and Poe and Chewie looked up to see a massive, new build Corellian freighter. The ship had similar features to the Falcon, but it was more than ten times the size and was a longer rectangular shape, unlike the round disc of the older generation freighters. Though the Millennium Falcon was clearly a rough sort of working transport, Poe was so used to the old girl and all her ad hoc repairs that this upgraded version appeared practically sleek.

“I have an idea,” Poe said, eyes lighting up. Chewie turned his head, regarded him out of the corner of his eye, then looked back at the behemoth freighter. He barked excitedly and they both jumped to action, punching in the connection codes to override its system and unlock the loading hatch. 

Poe was talking a mile a minute into the comm, excitedly explaining the plan to General Organa and Lieutenant Connix. “We’ll hitch a ride outta here - in and out, just like that,” he laughed and clapped his hands. 

“Are you sure the First Order ships won’t be able to track us?” the general’s voice asked warily. He couldn’t see her, but Poe could almost feel her narrowing her brown eyes at him and he guessed that she was tapping her cane on the edge of her foot like she sometimes did when taken by a thought. He smirked to himself as he finished typing in a code and retook his seat.

“I’m guessing their system will note there’s a Corellian freighter leaving the atmosphere,” he answered. “But we’re far enough away that we’ll appear as a single dot on their radar screens. By the time they realize it’s actually two of these bad boys sneaking off on them, if they clue in at all, we’ll be out of range and can make the jump!”

He caught Chewie’s eye and shrugged. He actually had no idea if that’s how First Order scanner’s worked but why trouble her with the details when this was their only option?

An encouraging beep came from the control panel and they started to move towards the larger ship - their overrides went through and within minutes the tractor beam was pulling them in through the hatch.

The inside of the new Corellian freighter’s cargo hold had high domed ceilings and bright LED light streamed through the cockpit window, nearly blinding Poe and Chewie, who let out a whine of protest and threw a shaggy arm up to shield his eyes. There was a hiss of decompressing air as the hatch rose and sealed the airlock beneath them and with a few quick adjustments to the controls, Poe deftly lowered the ship to settle onto the cargo hold floor.

“BB-8?” Poe hollered as he slung himself out of his seat and leapt out the cockpit door. He ran full tilt down the hall, sticking his head through each door he passed, his dark curls bouncing in time to his step. “BB-8!” 

He heard a friendly bleep and the metallic sound of the droid’s ball base rolling across the ship floor. “There you are!” he exclaimed, catching sight of a flash of orange and seizing upon it. BB-8 beeped happily and came to a stop at his feet. “I need you to lock their internal cargo hold door and jam their radios - quick, before whoever owns this ship comes busting in here and blasts us back out!”

He ran to the Falcon’s hatch as he spoke, BB-8 beeping and whirring alongside him. They rushed past a bunch of rebels standing huddled in a clutch with General Organa and Lieutenant Connix at the center, all of whom whipped around to gawk at him as he sprinted by. General Organa made as if to speak but Poe held up his hand to stop her, not breaking his stride. “On it - I’m on it!”

He slid around the final corner. “Open the hatch!” he shouted, catching sight of someone next to the door. They jumped at the urgency in his voice and slammed their fist onto the release button. BB-8 squealed, sped down the ramp into the gleaming cargo hold and bee-lined for the control unit on the far wall where he ripped off the panel doors. Poe could see little sparks shooting out from where BB-8’s appendages made fast work of the wires and fuses. With one last hard tug on a blue wire, the droid squealed, and if it had legs, Poe would have said that the little guy jumped for joy.

“Great work BB-8! Okay, now that they can’t contact the First Order to rat us out, let’s get out of here! Can you hack into their nav controls and set a course out of the atmosphere?”

With an affirmative squeal, BB-8 went back to tinkering with the control panel wires.

“Just get us a few clicks out,” Poe said. He heard footsteps coming from behind him on the Falcon’s access ramp and turned to see Connix speeding towards them with a worried look on her face. She looked incredibly young in that moment and Poe remembered with a jolt that even though she was barely out of adolescence, Connix was now the highest ranking officer in the resistance apart from the General and himself. 

“Our scanners are showing that this ship’s crew are on the other side of that door,” she gestured to the thick grey blast doors in the distance of the cavernous space. BB-8 let off a string of high-pitched beeps and continued fiddling with the circuitry. 

“What? Seriously?” Poe said to BB-8 with a note of mild concern before turning to face Connix. “He says they’re trying to blast the door in.”

“They know we’re here!” Connix cried. She whipped around to look at the door, studying it for signs of a breech. It was quiet, the only sounds were the whir of the air circulation system and the occasional zap of BB-8 frying their host’s circuits.

“Don’t worry,” Poe reassured her. “Those doors are impenetrable - they’re designed to withstand Rathtars.”

Connix eyed him skeptically. “Wouldn’t it be impenetrable from the inside out? To protect the crew in the main part of the ship? I mean, if they were transporting Rathtars, they would be kept here. In the cargo hold.” 

Her eyes fell on a massive packing crate nearby as she spoke and she unconsciously inched closer to the safety of the Falcon. Poe knuckled his lip, stifling the urge laugh.

“No Rathtars here I promise,” he insisted. “They would be hard to miss. As for the doors, that was the first thing BB-8 hacked and I trust this genius little droid with my life. Ain’t that right, buddy?” 

He rested his hand on BB-8’s domed head and cocked his own curly mop to the side, listening to the droid as it beeped excitedly up at him. A smile spread across his handsome features and he lifted his eyes to Connix once more.

“We’re way out of the atmosphere now,” he said and beamed at her. BB-8 released a handful of fuses and shifted his focus to an as yet untouched patch of tangled wires. “And we’re out of range of the Interdictor too. BB-8, take our gracious hosts on a little detour into hyperspace while Connix and I help the engineers patch up the Falcon. Oh man, I never get tired of ruining Kylo Ren’s day!”

***


	9. Chapter 9

Rey shivered and pulled her wrapper tight around her shoulders as the crisp click of her footsteps echoed down the icy tunnel. The air was biting cold, making her soft eyes water until a tear spilled over and froze on her cheek. 

This was the first untouched cave she’d found in the days since landing on Ilum. The planet bore the scars of overmining, with huge impassable swaths cut away from the surface, and in some places the crevices were so deep that lava bubbled up from underneath the crust. Rey spent the last few days cruising all over the surface in her shuttle searching for caves, stopping to trudge through snow drifts every time she spotted a promising cutaway in the mountainous terrain. 

Every cave so far was stripped of all its precious kyber, scraped clean to the bedrock as far down as Rey dared to travel into the labyrinthine twist and turns deep under the earth. During her cavern explorations of the day before she was forced to leave her torch behind to scale a shear precipice slick with ice and descended for hours in a dark so pitch black that she couldn’t even make out her pale hand held inches in front of her face. As dangerous as she logically knew that particular stunt was, she felt no fear. Since arriving on Ilum, Rey was thrumming with the power of the Force. She trusted in its guidance with the same level of certainty she felt about the sun rising and setting. The Force on this planet was strong, in both the Light and the Dark, and when her feet found purchase on flat ground once more, a prickle went up her spine and she knew kyber crystals were near. She followed their call with quick steps, pulled towards it involuntarily, until something told her those crystals were swimming with Dark energy and she willed herself to stop. They licked at her, enticing, and as tempting as a pool of springwater in a desert.

The chaotic energy pulse of the crystals followed no discernible pattern, and instead crackled randomly like lightning strikes. The promise of more tugged at her senses, seductive in its power. She thought of how good it would feel to face him on equal footing - how Kylo Ren’s brown eyes would burn with knowing when he saw her next, because he was the only person in the galaxy who could understand the profound release that came from giving in to this power and the relief at letting go all heavy notions of right and wrong. To just be and let the rest be damned.

Conflict welled up inside her. She ached to give in, to reach out and grasp that power that she could almost taste, not because it would be frustrating to leave kyber crystals behind after coming so far to finally be so near them, but because there was kyber here that spoke directly to her. The ancient Jedi texts explained that not every crystal would be a match. Like kindred spirits, something had to connect energetically between the stone and the one who would wield it. Something was calling her and it was sad and filled with hurt, but it felt like coming home. It was the look in Ben Solo’s eyes. 

It was unsettling how much she wanted this Dark thing, how easily they could fit together. But she could not let herself be tempted. With a reluctance that verged on physical pain, she turned away and left that door closed firmly behind. 

Today’s cave was unlike any of the others. This one bore no brutal, ragged hacks into the rock, no streaming rivulets of water forever dripping down the grey, barren stone. At first Rey thought the walls were covered in thick layers of ice, and a gasp escaped her lips when she stepped inside and saw that it was filled with pure, virgin crystal. It was blinding - all around Rey was bright and shimmering, every stray ray of light that leaked in from outside bouncing off the clear clusters that covered the walls on each side and dancing on the stalactites hanging high overhead. 

Rey moved slowly, taking it all in. A pure calm washed over her as she walked along the glittering path and the strongest tendrils of Light Force energy she’d ever felt caressed her, washing away any lingering doubt she still harboured about turning away from the Dark kyber the day before. She was being urged forward, pulled toward a vibration singing out from a single point somewhere up ahead. 

“Where are you?” she asked it. As if in reply, her eyes were drawn to a small patch of crystal that jutted out ten feet ahead at knee-height. 

Kneeling down in front of this spot that seemed to sing just for her, she placed her hand on the uneven surface. She sucked in a sharp intake of breath as if zapped by an electric shock. Warmth spread through her palm, up her arm and into her chest until her whole body was tingling with euphoria. “There you are,” she whispered and smiled to herself.

She slipped her pack off her shoulders and dug through it to extract her tools and got to work. Chipping bits of kyber away felt almost sacrilegious. As she worked a piece free, the metallic sound of her tools clanging echoed through the high ceilings of the chamber. Excitement throbbed in her ears with each ping of hammer on chisel, until finally an oblong stick of raw kyber popped free.

As she held her kyber in her hand, she felt the Force flow out from it and into her. Joy, hope, love, integrity, peace, serenity all stemmed from this little shimmering bit of rock and she was completely floored by how whole it made her feel to possess such a thing. She hadn’t realized just how fractured she had truly been before finding it, and marveled at how she had managed to come so far without something so powerful as this to tether her to the Force before now.

Without a second to lose, she sat back with and rummaged through her pack again, this time pulling out the broken halves of Luke’s lightsaber and the Jedi texts. A stroke of inspiration prompted her to lay out her staff next to the broken pieces as well. Rey took a deep, grounding breath and flipped through the book’s delicate pages to the chapters on lightsaber construction, and began.

*** 

A black Upsilon-class shuttle cruised low over Ilum’s schizophrenic landscape, which couldn’t decide if it wanted to be an icy wasteland or a sea of burning magma; the surface switched back and forth from one moment to the next. The shuttle flew through snow squalls so sudden and thick that they would white out the mountain ridges on the horizon, juxtaposed by the appearance of rivers of lava below that spit licks of flame high into the sky. Snowflakes and sparks danced together in the air on this remote planet where ice and fire, two incompatible elements, were forever fighting for dominance. 

A split in the mountainside came into view and the shuttle slowed, easing down to settle in the snow on the nearest flat outcrop. A masculine humanoid figure robed in black stepped out as the shuttle doors hissed open. He scanned the perimeter, his face hidden behind a shiny black mask with screened eye slits and a round grille where the mouth would be. 

He pulled a datapad from within the folds of his robes and took a few moments to study a holo of the terrain. With thumb and forefinger, he zoomed in to the current coordinates. The cave that was plainly in view a short distance away was not appearing where it should on the datapad records. Uncharted then. Satisfied, he stowed the datapad away within his robes and started towards the cave, snow crunching under his heavy boots.

He abruptly halted at the mouth of the cave. The only sounds were the whistling of the wind and the snapping of his robes as they whipped around his ankles but he bent his head forward, listening intently. His outstretched hand hovered before him, fingertips extending towards the entrance as though testing the air. He recoiled with a start and his hand shot to a holster at his hip.

Thrane Ren moved cautiously into the cave, lightsaber in hand.

***  
Rey sat hunched over her work, tools and oily rags scattered all around her. She absentmindedly swiped a stray lock of hair out of her eyes and smeared muck on her forehead in the process. Small blowtorch in hand, the pink tip of her tongue poked out from between her teeth as she guided the blue-white flame to carefully weld the second half of the broken lightsaber onto the double-handed hilt extension she fashioned from her staff.

She gave it a moment to cool and concentrated on breathing deep to calm her pounding heart. Then she stood, held the finished lightsaber aloft parallel to the ground, and whispered to herself, “You got this scavenger. You did everything right.” Rey closed her eyes and thumbed the switch.

The hum of the igniting saber rang in her ears. She shrieked in triumph and when she opened her eyes and saw that the steadily buzzing beam was violet in colour, her cry rose an octave and she couldn’t help but dance on the spot. She took another deep breath, and held the power switch down for a half second longer, and a second violet beam materialized from the other end. She squealed with delight, twirling the saberstaff in her hands, bringing it round for a few test strokes then, mesmerized and overjoyed, she fell into a rhythm of cuts, jabs, spins and parries. It was so similar to the staff she’d used for years, she quickly got a feel for it and carried on sparring with imaginary foes in the cave, but she couldn’t go long without letting deep wells of laughter bubble up to the surface. 

She was slicing through the air with both ends, working up a sweat, when she spun out and found herself face to face with Kylo Ren.

She froze, doublefisting the saberstaff overhead in a mock killing blow, wide eyes staring at his sallow face. His expression reeled through a number of emotions so quickly that Rey wasn’t sure she read any correctly. For a split second he wore a startled look tinged with, was that guilt? A flash of sheepishness? It was the look of someone caught in the act, but passed almost immediately into a smooth façade of indifference. Although Rey could’ve sworn at first glance that just before she swung round to face him, his look held a warm glow, and maybe almost a smile…

“Scavenger,” his curt voice cut through her musings like a knife. His face was like hard stone, but Rey felt waves of excited energy coming off him. As usual, he was wearing all black, though the flowy fabric looked soft and the juxtaposition against his harsh, strained facial features drew Rey’s attention. His inky hair which she remembered being so full and healthy when he first removed his mask in her presence now seemed lank and greasy, and there were dark circles under his eyes as well as a sickly hue to his usually milky skin. He noticed her evaluating him and interrupted her train of thought when he spoke. “I see you managed to fix the lightsaber. And...modified it.”

“Improved it,” she corrected him. She lowered her arms and narrowed her eyes at him, bringing herself up to her full height, although that only brought her nose level with the imposing man’s chest. “How long were you watching me?” She extinguished the glowing blades and crossed her arms, suddenly unsure of what to do with her hands.

The sheepish look briefly flashed across his features again but vanished just as quickly. “Long enough to witness a childish display,” he said, his patronizing tone hinting that he found the spectacle of her gleeful spontaneous dancing very amusing indeed. Rey felt the tips of her ears get warm, and hoped he didn’t notice her mortification.

But he didn’t appear to register her blush. His eyes instead kept flicking to her forehead. “What?!” she demanded, uncomfortable under this strange scrutiny.

“You, uh,” he pointed, lifting his thick eyebrows. “You’ve got...something on your face.”

Her fingers shot to her forehead and came away black with grease. Her mortification was complete. 

“I suppose you don’t ever get dirty,” she said, wiping the oil off her face with her sleeve and as much dignity as she could muster. “You probably have people to do your messy grunt work for you.”

“Lightsaber construction is the farthest thing from grunt work,” he replied. He nodded to the hilt she still gripped in her sweaty hand, looking genuinely interested. “Show it to me. Double-ended lightsabers are very rare. How did you manage to build such a complicated design without help?”

He stepped forward for a closer look, and Rey found herself thumbing the blades back to life and angling the hilt to give him a better view of her welding work. “I did have help, actually. I couldn’t have managed without the diagrams in the Jedi texts.,” she said without thinking.

“The Jedi texts?” He shot her a baffled look.

She mentally kicked herself, but there was no avoiding it now, the truth would have to come out. She sighed. “I took the ancient Jedi texts from Luke,” she admitted. “I stole them before I left him. I’m not sure he even knew they were missing before…”

There was an uncomfortable pause. Well, uncomfortable for Rey. Kylo was simply annoyed at being reminded of her connection with his former master. He quickly changed tack. “A scavenger and a thief now too,” he said, a mischievous glint in his dark brown eyes. “I don’t think that’s allowed on the Light Side.”

She rolled her eyes.

“The ancient Jedi texts though, I’d be curious to read them,” he ignored her and continued, the cadence of his deep voice failing to echo off the cave walls. “Although they’re probably full of hypocrisy and preach standards that are impossible to live up to. How do you find them?” 

She turned her face away, ashamed to admit how disappointed she was in the teachings she found within those brittle pages. Her fallen expression betrayed her and his eyebrows shot up in surprise. 

She was taken aback by a strong urge to confide in him all her doubts. She didn’t want to turn away from the Light Side, of that she was sure, but the more she studied the texts the more she was coming to realize that she didn’t agree with all the Jedi ways. She longed for guidance.

Kylo watched her quietly. His intense gaze penetrated her thoughts and she couldn’t meet his eyes. She looked instead at his mouth, but became intensely aware of how full and soft his lips looked. Rey was a tangle of emotions - all of them confused and wrong in some way. Kylo’s fingers twitched at his side, his own feelings mirroring hers and roiling through the air like a storm. He wasn’t wearing gloves, and the sight of his bare skin brought to bear the memory of when they reached out across lightyears to touch back on Ach To. Their eyes met when she glanced up, everything that went unsaid burning between them, and something ignited deep in her belly.

Rey cleared her throat and purposefully stepped away to kneel next to her tools, taking her time to pack them up one by one. “I can’t help but notice you’re being more civil with me this time,” she said as she snuck a sideways peek at him. He shrugged and continued to watch her hands while wearing an odd expression. 

“What are you doing? I can’t see what’s in your hands.”

“Packing up my tools.”

“Your voice has an echo,” he stated.

“I’m in a cave.” With the lightsaber complete, there was no need for Rey to linger so she figured there could be no harm in allowing him this vague clue to her whereabouts. 

“You aren’t with the Resistance. You were building a lightsaber in a cave…” he mused out loud, pacing as he spoke. He stopped to consider her for another moment, his smouldering stare causing a flutter in Rey’s belly, before his eyes went wide. “You went looking for kyber crystals. You’re on Ilum,” he announced triumphantly, a self-satisfied smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. 

“Not for long,” she replied, dusting gravel off her pants as she rose and shouldered her pack. “Wait, how did you know I’m not with the Resistance?” She was flooded with a surge of apprehension and shot him a questioning look filled with reluctant accusation.

“Oh don’t panic, your friends got away,” Kylo scowled. To Rey’s surprise, she didn’t detect any real malice in this statement and thought if anything it held more jealousy than spite.

“What happ-” Rey froze. Something wasn’t right; she looked over her shoulder towards the cave entrance and that’s when she felt another person’s presence, steeped in Dark Side energy.

Kylo stiffened. “What is it?” He watched her as she slowly pulled her saberstaff free and inched away from him, taking care to step silently along the tunnel length.

She gestured for him to be quiet, straining to listen for the intruder. Her eyes widened when she heard the unmistakable hum of a lightsaber and she gripped her own saberstaff tighter. 

A hulking figure clad in all black came into view, marching with heavy, sure steps towards Rey. It pointed at her with the tip of its blazing crimson weapon and continued advancing with singular intent. “Jedi,” a distorted masculine voice croaked with contempt. 

“Another creature in a mask,” Rey’s voice rang out high and clear over the sound of her blades igniting, washing a violet glow over her face. She cocked an eyebrow and held her saberstaff in an attack position. “Good. I’m looking forward to testing this out.”

They launched at each other.


	10. Chapter 10

Kylo barrelled down the gleaming halls of the Finalizer, rushing to the comm deck with a racing heart and sweaty palms, his still bare hands balled up into fists. He had been in his personal chambers when the connection with Rey broke off, and it wasn’t until he passed a group of petty officers that he realized he was dressed more casually than he had ever appeared in the working areas of the ship. 

The officers jumped out of the way and snapped into rigid salutes. The wild look in his eye was enough to scare them off from openly staring, for the officers tactfully ignored his loose sparring trousers and simple black undershirt. His bare feet slapped loudly on the floor and he felt their shock as he sped by, the sharp force of it smarting with their suppressed curiosity.

It could only have taken a few minutes to reach the comm deck but it felt like an eternity passed by the time he stormed in. A stirring of unease rippled through the room as the comms officers on active duty whipped their heads around one by one. “Out!” he shouted at them. He threw his arms up, waving them away frantically but didn’t break his stride. His long legs quickly brought him to the master control panel and he shoved a trembling officer out of the way. “All of you, get out!”

There was a flurry of movement but no one dared speak as they hurried out the door, casting wide-eyed glances over their shoulders at Kylo Ren. The Supreme Leader looking half crazed in his civilian clothes? That couldn’t be a good sign. In the back of his mind Kylo vaguely registered that his behaviour would very soon be the talk of the ship.

He watched as the last officer rushed out. As soon as the doorlock sealed shut behind her, his attention snapped to the master controls and he began furiously keying in strings of code, bypassing biometric firewalls with a fingerprint and retinal scan.

Four video call screens projected from the round holopad in the centre of the room. At first they were nothing but dark, translucent shimmers hovering and flickering before him but soon the call was answered and three figures in black appeared. Two of them were wearing masks similar to the one he used to don while serving Snoke, while the third holo showed a black-haired Pantoran female with cat-like eyes and thin yellow tattoos across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose that stood out against her blue skin. The fourth holo screen remained blank; unease prickled up Kylo’s spine.

“Knights of Ren” he inclined his head respectfully. His heart still thumped too fast as though it were trying to beat its way out of his chest.

“Supreme Leader,” the three Knights said in unison, the Pantoran’s undisguised feminine voice mixing almost perversely with the deep, harsh tones of the other Knights’ voice modulators.

“Thrane hasn’t answered the call. Do any of you know his location?” he directed the question to all of them, but his eyes fell on the Pantoran nonetheless. “Zagura? Have you seen him recently?”

“I was with him...I think it was four cycles ago. He went to the Ilum system to harvest more kyber,” Zagura said evenly. Kylo stiffened and she zeroed in on him with intense yellow eyes the same shade as her tattoos, a crease forming between her thin eyebrows. “What’s happened?”

“The Jedi girl from Jakku is on Ilum,” he admitted and looked away, unable to hold her piercing gaze. He paced behind the master control deck.

“If that is true, Thrane will soon find her and kill her,” Malachi, the taller of the two masked Knights, said. The flickering holo showed a man’s torso clothed in black with broad shoulders and thick, muscular arms built for snapping necks. His voice was distorted by his gleaming mask which sported squared off edges at the jawline.

“This is good news,” the other masked Knight nodded. He was an insectoid species and his mask was oval in shape to fit his elongated head with holes on top where his antennae poked through. When he flapped his wings, the holo would glitch out in a shower of white speckles, an effect Kylo knew was because of the iridescent sheen on Gunter’s wings that the holo screen couldn’t fully refract.

“No!” Kylo shouted and stopped to pound his fist on the control deck. The Knights cast sidelong glances at each other. “I want her alive.”

“But Kylo, that girl is the only weapon the Resistance has left to use against the First Order. Without her they have no hope of ever regaining any strength - you said so yourself,” Malachi said.

“I can turn her to the Dark Side,” Kylo straightened and attempted to smooth his facial features to appear indifferent. “There is Darkness in her, I’ve felt it. She would be an asset to the First Order, I just need time to persuade her.”

“If Thrane has found her then she’s dead already,” Zagura cut in. She lifted her chin so that she looked down her nose at Kylo, her eyes steely and hard.

“She is stronger than any one of you,” Kylo leaned forward as he spoke, shaking his upraised palms at them. The Knights scoffed, looking at each other and murmuring disbelief. Urgency leaked into his voice. “She split my face open the first time she ever held a lightsaber! Now that she’s been trained by Skywalker, it’s Thrane who’s the one in danger of getting killed. It’s been too long since any of you have been challenged by a competent opponent - your arrogance has blinded you. Whoever is nearest to Ilum needs to go there, now, and help him to subdue the Jedi. How close are you to Ilum?”

“I’m on Coruscant.”

“Degobah system.”

Zagura was shaking her head. Anxiety began to cloud her eyes. “It will take me two cycles to get to him.”

“Then I’m closest,” Kylo spoke with an air of finality. He cast his eyes around the room at the empty command stations and rubbed his chin. “I’ll go.”

He pressed his fingertip to the biometric scan pad on the master control to unlock the case for the ship’s manual override. The case popped open and with a flick of the switch, a high pitched alert sounded in the room. Kylo ran over to the nearest navigation station, pulled the current course map up on the screen and began setting new coordinates.

“I’m coming too,” Zagura said and her screen went blank.

“What are our orders?” Malachi asked.

Kylo’s fingers flew across the keyboard as he made the calculations for a hyperspace jump to Ilum, but he paused to look over his shoulder at his two Knights. They were impassive; Malachi crossing his huge arms, and Gunter twitching his wings like a beast absentmindedly shooing away flies.

“There’s no point in either of you coming to Ilum, we’ll be gone before you reach it,” he said. The sound of decompressing air emitted from the opening door on the other side of the room and his eyes took in Hux’s stiff form. Ignoring him but unable to suppress a grimace, Kylo turned his attention back to the navigation station and continued speaking to Malachi and Gunter without looking at them. “If I am unsuccessful in securing the Jedi, scour the galaxy until she is found.”

“What in Snoke’s name do you think you are doing?” 

Kylo shot a Hux a look boiling over with contempt. The manual override’s shrill alert tone still rang out and as the general’s bulging eyes roved over Malachi and Gunter on the holos and then fell on the coordinates being calculated on Kylo’s screen, his colourless face curdled with wrath. 

Malachi and Gunter glanced at each other once more before ending the call and the four blank holo screens evaporated.

“This is the military’s flagship, you cannot reroute it on a whim! The garrisons on board this ship are expected on the Takodana front, any delay to their deployment will mean heavy losses for the ground forces already stationed there!”

“The Finalizer is my ship, General Hux, or have you forgotten,” Kylo spat back. “I only suffer your ridiculous presence on my ship because The Supremacy II is not finished.”

Hux vibrated with hatred. “That day cannot come soon enough!” Spittle flew from his lips and landed on his chin when he spoke. His skin was the colour of milk gone sour but now blotches of vitriol bloomed under the surface of his cheeks. Seeing him turn puce, paired with the ginger hair peeking out from under his starched grey cap, Kylo thought he looked like an angry red berry. The effect was cartoonish and Kylo barked out a cruel laugh, but his amusement didn’t reach his eyes. Those were hostile and filled with unspoken threat. 

Kylo turned his back on Hux and slammed an open palm down on the hyperdrive button. A wave of g-force pressure bore down on him and he heard Hux make a strangling noise in his throat as the the windows framing the room blurred into a thousand streaks of light. He faced Hux and his face twisted into a mocking sneer. “The Finalizer will arrive in the Ilum system in three hours. It will stay in the atmosphere until I return from the surface,” he said in voice made all the more menacing for how quiet and controlled it was. He approached Hux with deliberate steps as he spoke, his bare feet leaving footprints on the spotless ebony floor in his wake. “Summon Destroyers to transport your stormtroopers to Takodana if you want. I don’t care. But don’t ever presume to have a say in what I do with my ship.”

Kylo towered over Hux, standing close enough so that the shorter man was forced to crane his neck to return the glare. He applied a small amount of pressure on Hux’s throat using the Force. Fear flitted behind the man’s eyes and Kylo let his gaze linger on the puckered circular scar on his face. He released his grip and the general drew in a rattling breath.

Kylo walked away. Not even tormenting Hux could still his racing mind. As he exited the airlock, he saw all the comms officers milling outside the door and whispering to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the longest chapter, I know. I had initially intended to have this chapter half Kylo half Rey POV, but it was taking so long I decided to split it up. And now let's see how Rey's faring....hoping to get the next chapter up before Christmas


	11. Chapter 11

The rapid-fire zings and whirrs of lightsabers slashing through air rang out, their echoes adding to the din as their soundwaves bounced off the cave’s glittering walls, making it sound as though an entire army of Jedi and Sith clashed.

Rey thrust her opponent back with a slash that came a hair’s breadth away from cleaving the blank mask from his face. Thane Ren came at her with a roar, relentlessly pounding with two-handed downward strokes, putting her on the defensive and forcing her to give ground. 

Laser hammered laser, exploding in red and purple showers of electric sparks. Her face was warm from the heat of the blades and beads of sweat dripped down her temples. Grunting with effort, she managed to push him back and met her opponent blow for blow. He was all brute strength, but she was fast and anticipated his every stroke. Rey dodged and parried away his mad swings, her small feet stirring up ancient dust as she danced around him. She felt an opening a half second before it arrived, and before she consciously knew she’d done it, she ducked low and managed to knick his thigh and her nostrils filled with the tang of burning flesh. 

Thrane roared and kicked her square in the chest.

She went flying and slammed onto the ground hard. All the wind knocked out of her, her chest tightened and she desperately sucked at the air in a vain attempt to breathe. Her head swam and black spots danced across her vision before it was all blotted out by a shadow and a red glow. She rolled just in time, barely avoiding being cleaved in two, and the crash of Thrane’s lightsaber hitting the ground inches away rang in her ear and left behind a sizzling black scar on the cave floor. Still on the ground gasping for breath, she swung herself around and tripped him with her foot, buying enough time to get back on her feet and scurry into position on the higher ground at the tunnel mouth, back to the only exit, boxing him in the tight space. Thrane wasn’t down for long before he was back up and on her, hacking madly against her double blades. She felt his rage build with each blow she blocked.

She knicked him again, this time on the shoulder. He stumbled and growled, a hand automatically going to cover the steaming wound. She jabbed again with her saberstaff but he sidestepped it, and striking quick as a serpent, his hand shot out to grab the hilt extension connecting her two violet beams, holding her fast. Alarm flared in her gut and Rey tried yanking her saberstaff back to no avail. His grip was like a vice. He pulled back, then suddenly headbutted her with a sickening crunch and pain seared her face. Her nose was burning and warmth poured down her lips and she tasted blood. Her vision blurred and she couldn’t see as her eyes filled and overflowed, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Through the tears she saw a fast-moving crimson blur and, placing her trust fully in the Force that sang all around to guide her, let go of the saberstaff and dropped into a low squat. The red laser beam zinged overhead, singeing the flyaway hairs that refused to be contained in her hair twists. She jabbed a punch at the wall of black robes before her - and a scandalized thrill ran down Rey’s spine at the realization that her fist pummeled into his soft groin. The Knight’s knees gave out and he choked out an anguished gasp that gurgled through the mask’s voice modulator, making him sound like a malfunctioning droid. 

He dropped both lightsabers to cup himself and fell sideways with a groan, a puff of dust blooming around him when he hit the ground. Rey snatched her saberstaff and scrambled to her feet, reeling through waves of nausea and swiping tears from her eyes with the back of a hand. She turned, every intention of sprinting back to her shuttle and leaving this mysterious assassin to writhe in pitiful agony, but then she felt his energy shift from rolling waves of pain to a blinding rage with singular purpose that set off alarm bells inside of her. She wheeled, swinging her blade low to deflect his awkward swipe from where he lay prone in the dirt, his crimson blade snuffing out the moment she struck it from his shaky grasp. 

A wet gurgle issued from the mask’s grille and the sense of blinding rage ebbed away like an outgoing tide. Rey looked down at her thrumming purple blade, impaled through Thrane Ren’s broad chest. The gurgling stopped, while the echoes of the dead Knight’s lightsaber hilt clattering down the tunnel length still reverberated off the crystalline cave walls. 

She thumbed the off-switch and with trembling fingers hooked the hilt, slippery with the sweat of her clammy hands, to her utility belt. Turning her gaze away from the body, she hastily gathered up her pack and hurried down the length of the tunnel. 

Once outside, wisps of light, dry snow whirled up from the mountain’s face to curl around her legs. She greedily gulped down deep breaths of the crisp air through her mouth, letting her eyes adjust to the sun glare that bounced off the snowy terrain, while gingerly prodding her throbbing nose and wiping some of the blood away. 

Her eyes fell on a black First Order Upsilon-class shuttle parked on the edge of the outcrop, its wings menacing obelisks jutting upwards to mar the skyline. Drawn by the same irresistible urge one gets to pick a scab, she found herself walking towards it, the snow crunching under her boots too loud in her ears. Forcefully ignoring an inexplicable sense of foreboding, she felt around until she found the door latch and opened it. Her lips pressed tight and she slowly took the small step that brought her inside, absentmindedly wrapping her arms around her middle.

The interior fit-out was minimal and austere, but she still felt as though she were intruding on someone’s home away from home. The living quarters had space for a handful of crew and passengers, but only two of the bunks were made up - a double with crumpled sheets carelessly tossed aside, and a smaller twin bed one cabin over. Perplexed, she made her way towards the cockpit and poked her head through the open door. Her eyes fell on a framed picture tacked onto the wall adjacent to the pilot’s seat.

An attractive Pantoran family beamed at Rey from the frame, mother and father each with a hand on their little girl’s shoulders, her own smile featuring a prominent gap left by a recently lost baby tooth. Clutched tight to her chest with her small blue hands was Thrane Ren’s unmistakable mask.

Rey ran from the shuttle and threw up onto the freshly fallen snow.


End file.
